It was now 1943, and the new year began very cold and damp. Dad was not too well and stayed indoors as much as possible. We had the job of finding enough wood and coal to keep the fire going. We missed our sister Lil, as she was the one who found the most coal along the railway track. Lil managed to send a little money home each month, and this helped to buy some extra coal, it was a great help to Mum and Dad. There were the usual arguments about who was going to fetch the water from the stream, particularly if it was raining, or even worse, snowing. We were all very pleased when the first signs of spring started to appear.
Dad seemed very reluctant to start on the allotment. Even when the weather started to improve he showed no interest in planning what he would be growing that year. The doctor visited Dad a few times, but this had happened before and we did not take much notice. The month of May began with some nice sunny weather, but Dad still stayed indoors most of the time. Mum was looking very tired and worried, the new baby was due at the end of the month, and we thought that was the reason. Our brother George would rush home from school, and if Dad was in bed he would sit quietly at the bottom of the bed.
Then one awful day, it must have been a Saturday as we were all home from school, our Dad was rushed to hospital. As there were only days left before the birth of her baby, Mum did not go with him. She was not too well and Dad told her to stay home. It was something she always regretted, not going to the hospital with him. When they carried Dad out to the waiting hospital car, we all rushed out to the lane to wave goodbye to him. He lifted his arm to wave back but even that was too much for him, and he just looked out of the back window. As the car pulled away we did not know that it was the last time we would ever see our beloved Dad. When we turned back to Mum she was standing there crying.
We were all very quiet the next day, and tried to help Mum as much as possible. Being a Sunday there was no bus service, and Mum said she had made her mind up to visit Dad the following day while we were at school. George did not want to go to school, saying he wanted to go with Mum, but she explained that no children were allowed to visit the hospital. He replied that he would wait outside and Dad could wave to him. Mum began to get cross, and told George that he had to go to school the next day. It was May 21st, and as we said goodbye to Mum and started to leave for school, our brother George began crying saying that he wanted to see his Dad. We could see that our Mum was near to tears, so we dragged George off to school.
When we arrived home that day, our next door neighbour was in the kitchen preparing our dinner. Mrs Williams said Mum was upstairs as she was not feeling very well, and that we were to be very good and quiet. She then told us that Mum had some very sad news for us. We all looked at one another but none of us could think what she meant. When our Mum came downstairs later, she looked awful, her face was all blotchy and tearstained, and when she began to speak she started to cry. Seeing Mum cry made us cry, even though we had no idea why she was crying. Her words when she managed to speak made no sense to me. She said: “Your Dad passed away today.” Mum then started to cry again, and went back upstairs.
Mrs Williams came back in the evening, and I asked her what ‘passed away’ meant. She told us that our Dad had died, and we would never see him again. At the thought of never seeing Dad again, we all began to cry. Our George shouted that he was going to see his Dad and nobody was going to stop him.
My Father’s body was brought home from the hospital the day before the funeral. The coffin was placed in the front room on a table, and the lid was left open for anyone to pay their last respects to him. When I went in to see Dad, I thought at first he was sleeping, but he was laying so still, and his hand was so cold when I touched him, that I ran out of the room crying.
As I was only ten at the time I could not comprehend the meaning of death, but I knew my Dad was not just sleeping. I could not bring myself to go into the front room anymore while Dad was laying there.
During the day my elder sisters arrived home, followed by my Gran, uncle Bill and aunt Dot. They had come to attend the funeral the next day. As nobody wanted to sleep in the front room where Dad was, it was difficult for Mum to sort out the sleeping arrangements. My eldest sisters shared the front bedroom with Mum, and my brothers had to sleep in our bedroom, leaving their room free for Gran. The only place left for my aunt and uncle was the kitchen, so Mum made a bed up for them on the kitchen floor. It must have been quite uncomfortable as the floor consisted of stone slabs.
The day of the funeral dawned. Mum had decided that it would be better for us to attend school, rather than go to Dad’s funeral. So the only memories I have of the day are how the teachers were so nice to us.
The headmaster even mentioned in assembly that morning, what a sad day it was for my family, and this made me feel quite important. When we arrived home from school, my sister Lil said Mum was having a rest as she was not feeling well. Lil started to prepare the evening meal, and as there were more of us then usual it took longer. Gran kept saying how cold and hungry she was, but made no attempt to help in any way. I heard our Lil mutter: “Oh shut up you miserable old cow.” I was shocked to hear Lil speak like that as it was so unlike her. I looked at Gran to see if she had heard, but luckily she was busy talking to uncle Bill.
It was well into the evening before my Mother came downstairs, and when she did she looked quite ill. Her eyes were red from crying, and there were tears running down her face. Lil made her sit near the fire as she was shivering. She then gave Mum a small bowl of stew to eat, but Mum only had a few spoonfuls then she left the rest. Lil told her to go back to bed, and said not to worry about anything, as she would see that everyone had a meal. We could see how worn out Mum looked, and tried to be helpful, but it was Lil who did most of the work. We all would have been lost without her. Later that evening we said goodnight to our relatives and went quietly to bed.
At the time I did not realise what the death of my Father meant to Mum and the family, emotionally, and financially. Now with hindsight, I can only look back in admiration at how my Mother coped. She had been left a widow at the age of forty two, with six children of school age to raise, and the birth of a new baby due any day.
The following day Emm and Anne left, and soon after Gran, and my uncle and aunt started to pack their belongings. I noticed that uncle Bill had Dad’s only suit, even though it was quite shabby, and he also packed various tools belonging to Dad. Then Gran asked where Dad’s silver tobacco box was, as she thought it would be a nice memento to have. Luckily Mum had given it to Emm to keep.
When they had finally gone our Lil said: “Good riddance, I am fed up of waiting on them.” Mum must have thought the same as she did not tell Lil off for being rude.
